On gods and dogs
I just discovered a fantastic site about our favorite dance:
The author remains anonymous, but I think it is a woman, and I think she is a New Yorker. The site is witty, sassy, and fun, and it contains a few adorable surprises.
Here is another jewel I have found floating on the net:
“I like so much what the old adage Carlos Gavito told me. To paraphrase:
‘The leader invites a movement, the follower moves, the leader follows.’
That’s my tango.” - Keith Elshaw, Tango DJ
Quite possibly a tango deity. And the sexiest thing I have ever read!
On the other hand, I have recently found and been skimming through a journal I found so arrogant and offensive, I had at first mistaken it for being a spoof. Really:
“I’m slowly coming the conclusion that a follower of sufficiently motivated desire can learn a lot more at a milonga than in a group class. However she’ll gain more in group classes in technique (which a lot of teachers don’t teach to) That is assuming that she’s had some very firm foundations courses under her, and that she’s mastered her basics. I still believe that she can not show up at a milonga and ‘dance’. Its just not going to happen. Hmmmm, ok, maybe it will happen, but not for long…it depends on (don’t take this the wrong way folks because its clearly a sexist remark) but it depends on how hot looking she is. This is MEN we’re talking about and aside from the 10% of the male population that actually CARE what their dance partner does with them on the dance floor, she’ll get danced as completely beginner.”
and:
“For tango folks, feeling is hard, creativity is difficult…for me…its easy. I do it all the time. Its the comment I get the most, “You’re so creative!”. Now either my followers are blowing smoke up my ass, which is entirely possible, OR I’m actually that. Months ago, I would have gone with answer A, today I’ll go with answer B. Being creative, FEELING the music comes naturally for me, that’s because I spent 13 years doing it… My problem comes when I have to go back and repeat the same move over and over and over again, exactly the same way. That to me is frakkin BORING! Because once I get a move I want to take it and experiment with it. Change it, play with it…see where else I can take it. Some of the coolest things I’ve come up with, I’ve done simply by asking, “WHAT IF….” Tango requires me to go all left brain, because for me, I’m all right brain to a certain extent when it comes to dance. Its easy for me to ‘feel’ and ‘be creative’. That’s easy.”
Wow. I mean, wow. This makes my blood boil. With passionate, all-consuming… disgust.
Now to disinfect my(your) brain(s) with what Pablo Veron had said about dancing tango:
“A good tango dancer is someone who has rhythm and who has a good musical ear. He also has to respect the woman; to know what to do at the right time with the right partner. He adapts himself to the woman. He makes her feel that she is the best dancer. He dances for her. If he can execute complicated figures gracefully, he’s good. But as long as he can dance in harmony with his partner, then he’s an excellent dancer.”
Speaking of disgust, last night, a tango dog sat next to me after being refused a dance (he is of the B.O. variety), and called me a “bitch.”
Upon which, I stood up slowly, put my hand on the wall behind him, and looming over him like a common sreet punk, told him: “You are a sad, pathetic little pig. If you ever say that to me again, or come within five paces of my person, I will kill you. Hear me? I will kill you.“
I then immediately accepted a dance with my favorite leader, who is 6 feet tall, handsome, and dances like royalty. As he took me into the line of dance, I stuck my tongue out at the tango dog and gave him a wink. He had his mouth open, and looked a little scared.
Immature? Totally.
Should I have slapped him instead? Yes.
Could I have handled it with more class? Possibly.
Did I feel bad? No.
Would I have felt bad a month ago? Probably.
Had I ever bullied another human being in my life? No.
Would I do it again?
Definitely.
Uh..Yeah. Sometimes I think tango is a place where women haters lurk, trying to disguise themselves as romantics. They are very easy to spot.
Nuit,
I adore you.
I am hereby, with this post, your devoted groupie.
You are my heroine.
Tangobaby
That blog drives me crazy every time I read it! How can one be so arrogant and self-absorbed. Here’s to hoping that the tango dog and the blogger are one and the same! You’ve got sass, girl!
Ha ha ha… you rock my world.
Truly.
*hug*
Coleen
Oh my God! How did you refrain from not punching him in the head? Because my fist nearly punched the screen!
What an F%$&(#G PAJERO! say it like this PA-hair-Ro!
wow…. after calling you a bitch, did he think he would ever be given the pleasure of dancing with you? Or that you would not tell others of his rude and unforgivable behavior?? It boggles the mind…. some people don’t get it, regardless of what “it” is, they just don’t get it!
Girlfriend… you’ve got cojones! Love it!!! “I will kill you.” Think I’ll give that line a try for the next tan-ego. Big big fan of yours!
besos,
Eva
I see you found Miles’s blog… He seems very unaware of how offensive some of the things he writes are.
About your reaction to the jerk, all I can say is : Finally, someone who is treating these morons appropriately. But I would encourage taking it one step further ask the host to kick him out. They might not do that the first time, but if enough people are doing it, eventually the assholes would find themselves on the outside.
It looks like “that guy with the blog” has got some health problems that affect how he moves, talks/writes, and behaves toward others… I perfectly see how he might be offensive, but sometimes I wish people just let him be.. because he just probably one of those who need professional help.
hi frances,
thanks for visitng my blog. i appreciate what you have said about leaving “him” alone. honestly, i hadn’t realised there were so many people reading him — i had just discovered his writing, as i have only started blogging this month.
i am sorry to hear about his medical issues, and i am moved by your compassion. however, i do not feel that his personality defects should be forgiven in light of his physical one. i do not let myself indulge in feeling pity for others. that is a luxury for those who have more patience and are more forgiving than i am. i guess you could call it my own personality defect.
this man’s ignorance and his mental processes is being proliferated via the internet (now the fastest and farthest-reaching tool of communication), and i feel that, more than anything, is a disease — perhaps an even more dangerous one than his physical ailments.
these blogs are created as a way of reaching out and communicating with others. i feel it is our duty to treat him as he deserves — namely, to respond to his thoughts and writings in the most honest way possible. negative or positive, it is important to respond to him with utter sincerity.
no one deserves less than that.
Nuit,
I completely agree that it is very important to give feedback! Just, in that case, I believe the best way of giving negative feedback would be to stay clear of him, in flesh or in virtual world. But of course, it’s just my point of view. I appreciate your sharing yours, in content, and in form. Thanks for beautiful writing!
dear frances,
thanks for writing back. i do agree with you, that the best thing against a journal such as M’s, would be to be silent. and not read it at all! :) i want to get violent every time I read his posts… that can’t be good for my own physical or mental health.
kisses,
nuit.
Nuit,
I think it’s fine to write whatever you want to write. This is your place to express yourself. Feel free.
In any case, I felt that you were reacting to what Miles *wrote*; you’ve never met or spoken to him, and you’ve not intimated that you have, or that you’re speaking specifically about *him.*
Miles is here in the Bay Area; as far as I know, he doesn’t have health problems, but I could be wrong. You’re not alone in how you’re reacting to his writing and ostensible attitude.